6. Dressing Like You Didn't Make An Effort
Sometimes we can get lax in our appearance. Or we think "they need to like me as I am." Sorry, that's not how it works.
Your first dates are job interviews. You must put forth the same effort you would in an interview for a potential job. I have gotten feedback from thousands of gay men over the years, so trust me when I tell you how important the effort is that you put into your appearance.
Make sure your pants are hemmed perfectly. Everything should be pressed. No flip flops, no shorts, no hats.
Some clothing and shoes are so familiar to us that we don't see how raggedy they've become. I remember being in a Coach store and my girlfriend was showing me new wallets. I told her I didn't need a new wallet; mine worked just fine. And as I pulled it out of my purse to prove my point, I finally saw it in the glaring fluorescent lights amid all the brand new leather wallets - and it looked AWFUL. All of a sudden, I saw it for what it was: a wallet I had used almost every day for 8 years. 8 years! Ratty, worn, and very worn-out. If I was on a date with someone and they pulled out a wallet that looked like that, it would definitely send the wrong message. Would it be an accurate message? Maybe not. But not a good impression for sure. There's a reason people buy Mont Blanc pens, and it's not because they write better than a Bic.
Have a trusted friend give your closet the once-over so they can help you see what needs to be spruced up. So you have a favorite pair of boots for the fall and winter. Do they need to be polished? If you must wear flip flops on a date (if you do, they should be designer ones) are you doing the proper maintenance on your feet? Are your fingernails clean and trimmed? Are your pants too baggy? Is your belt showing wear and tear?
Making the extra effort in your appearance shows your match that you care about how you look, and that is a GREAT first impression!
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